3 posts tagged “lemonade diet”
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Tomorrow, I will be on solids.
Obviously a full weight deconstruction will follow tomorrow.
I have spent most of this weekend in bed, since it's much easier not eating when you're asleep. When I finally did get up at midday today (oh, ok, 12.30, if you must know) I had fun and games when my body started freaking out because I had really low blood sugar. Fainting on the toilet is *so* not a good look. Tres Elvis Presley.
However, I think it's because I'm not actually drinking the full recommended amount of the 'lemonade' concoction. I actually can't - it makes me feel a bit sick thinking about it. I think it's because of the maple syrup element which adds a sweet aftertaste that is difficult to get rid of. My housemates actually quite like the drink, so it's clearly because I'm just really not used to drinking overly sweet things.
To pacify my blood I'm topping up the mixture with the occasional apple. This does somewhat negate the detox element of the week, but it's not like it's vodka. Or heroin.
I feel pretty shit, to be honest, and this is certainly not the kind of thing I'd be able to do for any real length of time. However, I knew it was going to be hard and it's not like I'm unaware that it's unhealthy, faddy and stupid... but so is going out three nights in a row and getting hammered, ordering the really bad stuff from the Indian takeaway and not taking part in any exercise.
Oh, and I've lost two pounds.
Having had an epiphany regarding loseweightfeelgreat, I have been delivered a message by fate (non-believer, since you ask) in the form of one of those hideous Channel Four documentaries. It was all about two average girls becoming UK size 2 in 5 weeks. Whilst it included the oblgatory shot at the end of them agreeing that the whole experience was awful, and they would Never Diet Again, it inevitably acted for many people as a spur. There was a reason it was shown in January.
Seriously, if it had that effect on me, a practically well-adjusted grown-up, I dread to think what I'd feel if I was a self-conscious teenager. It's irresponsible broadcasting. If I was any more pro-active I'd write a strongly worded letter.
Whilst it in no way made me think that I would like to follow in the footsteps of those girls it did lead me to the conclusion that I'd rather go through 7 days of hell than 3 months of eating sensibly. Whilst I know this sounds ridiculous, when you bear in mind that I don't eat any vegetables, much fruit or any seafood, you can see that most well-balanced diets are not really an option for me.
And so.... the lemonade diet.
Lemonade seems a bit kind for this. It's basically a concoction of lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne pepper that you drink during the day, as well as water.
And that's it.
No, it doesn't look sensible. Yes, it looks disgusting. And yes, I'm totally going to try it.
I've canceled pretty much all plans - there's no way I can sit in the pub and only drink water. And I'm fully expecting to be starving, grouchy and miserable. But it's just for 7 days, and I'm determined to do it. I think the main problem will be finding something else to do, rather than eating. Meals break up the day, so I've had to arrange to do something each lunch break, to avoid sitting down in front of a great big plate of pasta.
So far? It's 3pm and I've just slept for 12 hours. Perhaps I could spend the next 7 days asleep. Or not. I've now got to get up and go and buy my ingredients and make my first concoction.
Roll on bed time.
